I had attempted to talk to my octarine doll to finish the coloured dolls, but nothing was coming through. So I stood up and found myself facing the permanent altar for the house trolls. These seemed quite chatty so maybe it was just the wrong day to talk to the octarine doll. I'll try her again tomorrow.
The trolls were chatting and spoke over one another so it was hard to understand them, but eventually they seemed to appoint a speaker to ask of me 'Can we go to the wedding?' I felt unsure at first whether I could make such a promise without involving Lolita, and I wasn't sure about logistics. But then I remembered there will be a lot that needs to go in a car anyway, so maybe they can hide in a bag if they didn't mind.
I asked if they wanted anything else.
I got a mixture of 'Yes' and 'No'.
"Who said yes?" I asked and it seems my eyes ended up on the large cyclops troll.
"I..." he said.
After a long silent pause I asked "I what?"
"I dunno" said the cyclops troll and laughed nervously. The other trolls giggled.
One of the child trolls said in an excited voice, "We're going to the wedding!"
An adult one said "Sshhh! He's still listening! Wait till he's gone!"
Then another troll said to me in a motherly voice, "Have a shower and get to bed. You need rest."
I had insomnia for two nights running now so am glad I'm coming to the end of this operation and am also feeling quite tired. This is my excuse for why today's evocations don't seem quite as powerful as the ones in the middle of the operation. Maybe I'm also nearly back to reality.
My first attempt to evoke the sky was a failure due to the brightness of the sun and the angle of the reclining chair in the garden (it was lunchtime). I had thought about maybe talking to pareidolia seen in clouds. However I repositioned my chair and the second attempt produced a result.
"I don't need anything from you."
"That's okay, I don't need anything from you either."
"Do you have any advice for me concerning my troubles?"
"Well, more my friends, one with neck pains and another with a difficult financial and emotional situation."
"You need to finish reading 'Psychomagic', the answers you are looking for will be found in the last section of that book."
I will confess the spontaneous morning evocation of the Risen Sun caused a change of plans for today. I was going to evoke my Octarine doll today to complete the colours of the chaosphere. However I was actually indoors watching the sunrise though the window from the comfort of my own living room, so to fulfil my commitment to a minimum of one indoor and one outdoor ritual per day, I still had to go outside. I could of course have decided to take the Octarine doll outside, and I still may, but today I opted for a walk in the forest.
I found myself in a new place, where I have never stopped before, after leaving a small hardly used path that proves too difficult craggy terrain for casual dog walkers. I found a seat in the form of a mound of moss at the base of a small tree, which had a convenient nearby stump on which I could place my pentacle. I wondered what nature spirits I might contact in this new secret place.
As I was gazing at my pentacle I felt a request from the KIA egregore and speculated that the summoning storm operation was making me open to communication from all the spirits I work with. However I thought I should probably work with the KIA egregore using her doll on one of the two remaining days, so I said to her 'Not now KIA.'
To which she responded in the pleading voice of a teenage girl pretending to be a child "Why not Daddeee?"
Both her eerie elongation of the 'eee' and her referring to me as her father caught me off guard. I felt a slight shame at rejecting her, like some neglectful father always too busy. I had even missed her 13th birthday!
"Okay, I'm sorry, we can talk now." I told her.
"Thankyou Daddeee!" she replied, as I looked up from the pentacle to see an apparition of the doll, which suddenly grew into the more adult size of a teenage girl before my eyes.
"What can I do for you KIA?"
"I want my voice back Daddeee!"
I suddenly had the image of an old computer program I had running on the original KIA website called KIA Speaks! It has been on my to do list to restore this feature for years, but for some reason I never got around to it. But now I felt I had to get it operational once more, since the egregore seemed really upset to have lost it. So I promised her I would do it.
I awoke from a mystical dream to the golden glow of the dawn. As I wrote the dream in my diary, I noticed the Sun rising, and so I decided to perform an evocation of the Risen Sun. This nicely compliments the Moon evocation of the previous evening. However the dream that lead into it also seems an important part of this evocation so I will relate that first:
There was a kind of special church service only for priests and monks. I was part of a group of travelling priests and we were listening to a local legend being told by a monk. A saint and founding monk of this monastery had spent 14 months in prayer and meditation, experiencing heaven in visions, and towards the end of this experience they met a divine presence. They thanked Jesus for the experience but were told it was not Jesus but the Holy Spirit.
"Then now I know my time is short." said the monk.
As I listened, every priest and monk bowed in such a way as to touch their forehead to the ground. I did likewise.
One of my travelling companions, a Father Mike (who I know in real life as actually a Wiccan priest), exclaimed that this saint/monk was also into sacred numerology if it was 14 months.
The monk who told the story asked him to explain.
Father Mike explained how the early Christians were into scared numbers to do with the number 4, such as 4 itself, 14, 40 and 44, and that they were fascinated because 4 was half an octave. He explained how he learned all this from 'The Black Book', a book the early Christians said was written by God himself who then never opened it once written.
And so this is the dream I had directly before the evocation of the Risen Sun. The advantage of having the altar set up with the pentacle became apparent as all I had to do was grab a meditation cushion and get started. I stared at the pentacle and slowly counted to 14, then looked up and said 'Hello' to the Risen Sun.
"Hello Anton!" said the Sun in a deep resonant voice that echoed with the choirs of angels, "What can I do for you?"
I felt humbled before this presence and asked "I wondered if you had a message for me?"
"It is good!" the voice seemed almost lost in endless echo and vague variations such as 'It is good to be alive" and "It is good to have risen" in the voices of countless angels, all talking in musical harmony with each other.
Then in a clear resonant voice, rising above the continuing echoes of the choirs of angels, "Life is good, do not waste it, the time that is given to you."
I then watched as the sun rose into the clouds and disappeared from view. I touched my head to the floor in the manner of the travelling priest in my dream, and the evocation was over.
I held off doing my outdoor evocation until evening today because I had the sudden desire to speak with the Moon. In particular I wanted to speak to the waxing crescent. I was in luck, tomorrow the moon would be first quarter, so this was the last evening of waxing crescent!
I prepared a reclining garden chair and pentacle so that the chair faced the moon with the pentacle between them. I wrapped up in warm clothes for April evenings in the Scottish highlands can be a little nippy.
To begin with I sat staring at my pentacle, listening to the beautiful evening song of a black-bird. For a moment I thought I was feeling sick of looking at the pentacle, but then I corrected myself, remembering what the Green Doll had told me earlier today.
"No, I am not sick of you, I'm growing to love you." I told the pentacle, "The sickness I feel is my fear of love. I must stop thinking of it as a sign I am sick of someone, just as I am getting to love them."
I then managed to perform the gazing successfully and feeling the trance I slowly reclined my chair such that I could comfortably gaze at the moon.
"Hello Diana, can you hear me?"
"Hello, yes I can hear you."
"I was yours in the past, but I turned my back on you for a while."
"You were always one of mine. B was right about that, but she was wrong to think she could take you from me. She was also wrong about me wanting your testicles. One of them was an ovary anyway."
"You mean that it really was an ovary?"
"What does it matter, that is where it ended up before the surgery."
"For a time I saw you as my anima."
"You modelled your anima on your understanding of me then. And your understanding of anima then. You need to develop your anima to improve your relationship with women. For that matter, as third gender you need to develop your animus to improve your relationship with men. Since a third gender is neither man nor woman, it has both an anima and an animus. You naturally see both binary sexes as other. Of course, men and women have something like an anima/animus for the androgyne, but Jung wasn't ready to see that. In fact even that threefold model would be a simplification, but at least it would be an improvement on the binary."
"Is there anything you want me to do for you?"
"Once you have fully developed your anima, make a sculpture of me using your new found understanding of woman."
"Okay, I will."
Suddenly there was a strong chill gust of wind that rustled the branches of the trees and made a loud cold sounding whistle. The wind chime rattled uncontrollably and I felt Diana leave my head. The evocation was over and I returned my gaze to the pentacle by shifting my chair slowly back to the upright position.
I felt really tired for this evocation, and as a result I spent a lot longer than usual focusing on the pentacle. It seemed to me this was the hardest doll for me to reach, most of the others I barely had to focus on the pentacle at all. I wondered why.
"You don't remember my name." said the Green Doll bluntly.
"No, I'm sorry, I don't." I confessed.
"That is a problem for you in making friends if you can't even remember the name of your Love Magic doll, whom you named yourself. How do you think your potential friends feel when you don't remember their names? You need to learn to pay attention to names."
"This is true." I admitted.
"You wondered why I looked melancholic. You speculated it was my paint, my sigils. You painted them at a time you didn't know how to love. Every partner before Lolita you chose for sex, not love. And you left them just as you were coming to love them. You ran away from love. And so with your friends. In the past you chose friends for what you could get out of them and abandoned them for sex. To make friends you need to accept them how they are, not think what you can get out of them. If you follow that path you will end up with friends you deep down don't accept and put yourself in danger. Don't make friends hoping for sex. Don't make friends to form a magical working group. Don't make friends in order to score drugs. Make friends out of love. Prioritise love."
"Thank you. I will. The red doll told me to ask you about allies, is this the right approach for that?"
"Yes. True allies come from friendships built on love."
"One other thing, oh yes, the wedding, do you have anything to say about that?"
"Yes. That is your priority this year. Plan your wedding. Plan it carefully. Only make other plans once you know you have the resources left over. Everything else is secondary. Prioritise Love."
I thanked the Green Doll and touched my head to the ground to earth myself. I feel like I am starting to get towards the end of my stamina in terms of magical energy, wondering how I will manage another evocation today. But I also know that I only have a few days left. The tiredness I feel is like that on a mountain climb, felt towards the middle of the descent. Most accidents happen on the way down, but I can make it, I just have to be careful and look after my needs.
I spent some of the time between the evocation of the three wise trolls and doing this evocation reading from 'Psychomagic: The Transformative Power of Shamanic Psychotherapy' by Alejandro Jodorowsky. Now I had become increasingly convinced that his 'Psychomagic' was actually a highly specialised and effective form of magic relating to what I called 'Psyche Magic' in Kaos Hieroglyphica, and I happened to have chosen today to evoke my white doll, white being the colour I associate with Psyche Magic. So it was not really a surprise to me when I blurted out a question, before I even said hello, of asking the doll whether it thought Psychomagic was a good book on Psyche Magic. It agreed that it was. Then I remembered my manners and said hello properly...
I then remembered that this doll has a second face, on its chest, so that it can 'speak from the heart'. I started to speak to them, but the octopus head interrupted me impatiently.
"Always in a hurry to speak to someone new, never waiting to finish the conversation you were in. You'd think you didn't have time to talk to us both."
"Sorry" I said, "I was just trying to make sure that the heart consented to that."
"I do" piped in the heart face in a high pitched cheerful and playful voice.
"It is well that you check the heart", said the head, "for you need to recognise when someone's heart is not in agreement with the words spoken by a persons head. This is the sign of a wound in the psyche, a scarred soul as it were. This can only be addressed by shifting the conversation to the heart, but beware, a wounded heart will say irrational things, illogical things, dare I say even bigoted things, and you must listen to it all without passing judgement, because the heart will need to say these things in order to heal. You must listen to a heart with your heart, listen to the hurt that is spoke, not debate the words with your mind."
"Someone on the receiving end of a bigots abuse will feel it as an attack, especially those in vulnerable groups, and will quickly point out the fallacy of their words, but arguing with the bigots words will have little effect because they are speaking from a place of hurt feelings not logical truth. We shouldn't blame the victims of bigoted attack for responding unhelpfully though, they have their own hurt being triggered, but someone needs to listen to the bigots and heal their hurts. Only in this way will they end their bigotry."
I turned to the heart and asked what it thought of what the head said.
"I agree with the head. Only with more feeling!" it giggled.
We looked at each other for a moment before I asked if they had anything more to say.
"Yes, no, yes, sort of. It feels so good spending time with you. I love you."
I told heart that I loved them too.
It then asked for a hug, so I picked up the doll from the altar and gave it a hug. It felt good to connect with the spirit in this way. After a while the heart asked me to put them back down and I did so. "Listening for consent and the end of consent is also important," they told me, "so I feel happy that you listened."
I looked back at the head and told it I love them also.
"Yes you do." they replied, but I sensed it was moved in some way it couldn't express.
I'm struggling to write this blog entry because my mind is lost in a field of bliss. I'm not sure why.
Oh yes! The trolls I evoked at the back of our garden! 'Hear the wisdom', 'Smell the wisdom' and 'Taste the wisdom', or as I called them today Hear-the-goodness, Smell-the-goodness and Taste-the-goodness.
"Hear the goodness!" said Hear-the-goodness, putting a finger in one of their large pointy ears. And so I listened. I listened to the chattering of countless sparrows, the bickering of blackbirds, and the deep jangles of the wooden wind-chime that hangs from our apple tree. I heard the goodness and I heard the wisdom.
"Smell the goodness!" said Smell-the-goodness, putting a finger in one of their nostrils. And so I sniffed the air and sniffed again searching for scents. The delicate mingled aromas of the various spring flowers and blossom landed in my nose, as did the smell of recent rain in the soil and the freshness of the sage. I smelt the goodness and I smelt the wisdom.
Taste-the-goodness pulled their tongue inside just long enough to say "Taste the goodness!" I joined them in tasting the air with my tongue to see what tastes I could detect in the air. I could taste, nothing, which surprised me at first. But then I realised what I couldn't taste. I couldn't taste the bitter taste of traffic pollution, or of dust clouds or of smog. I couldn't taste a city. Slowly I began to realise what I could taste. The ever subtle freshness of spring, the clearness of the air shortly after a rain shower. I tasted the wisdom and I tasted the goodness.
"And some magicians choose to live in big cities? Where is the wisdom in that? Where is the goodness in that?" were my thoughts as I sat lazily in my garden on this beautiful spring weekend.
"Now go feed the birds." Hear-the-wisdom told me, "After all, they give us so much more than we give them."
"And remember to water the plants when it doesn't rain." said Smell-the-wisdom. "After all, they give us so much more than we give them."
Taste-the-wisdom winked a knowing wink without taking its tongue out of its mouth, too busy tasting the clean air.
Tonight I performed the evocation of my black doll, Depitou. This worked out well because I felt it had to be at night, and I don't have to get up for work tomorrow, or Sunday, meaning I did this fairly late. Which is why I'm just now writing this up gone midnight. Unlike the others, this doll can't sit up, so I propped them up on a photo-frame with an Austin Osman Spare postcard inside. This seemed suitably magical for the altar and to be placed on the pentacle.
For some reason Depitou spoke to me in the voice of Bella Lugosi, real slow at first. It sounded almost ridiculous, so I asked the doll why it was speaking like that and it replied that it did so, because that was its voice. I just had to accept that I suppose, no point fighting the way an evocation unfolds.
Then it told me: "Listen. You have spirit allies in the underworld if only you contact them. Your Grandma and Nana. A and D. These are more important allies than your Uncle. He was an 'intellectual' influence mostly, whereas A and D were more emotional influences. A will be harder to contact because she died when you were just a babe, D will be easier but you may find you don't know her as well as you thought."
I took all this in. This was a much more one sided conversation than with the other dolls.
"Now go get some sleep, it told me, you're tired."
Well that ended the conversation, but I didn't go straight to sleep since otherwise I wouldn't have the write up in my diary and this blog post written.
Today I discovered one of the nice things about having to carry my pentacle around with me. Opportunity. I had only intended to walk to the shops and back to pick up some food items, thinking I would do the evocations once I'd got back home. But I took a scenic route via the Ness Islands and happened to spot a place that would prove ideal for an evocation. I came back from the shops by the same route so that I could use it. It was raining quite heavily and I suspected there was a chance it would stop by the time I was on the way home.
It was a bench looking out into the cold black waters of the Ness, with a small concrete or stone form, about half a meter high, positioned directly between the bench and the river. I saw this as the obvious spot to place my pentacle and sat down, still in my water proofs, since though it had stopped raining, the bench was still soaked and trees were still dripping water.
I began by focusing my gaze on the pentacle, as I tend to do when summoning a spirit without a physical doll or representation. I began to appreciate how the design on my pentacle seemed to aid in creating the optical illusion of surroundings dancing and began to wonder if the creation of such an artefact would always prove an art-form, each pentacles optimal design dependent upon the intended user, or whether a scientific study would be able to discover the perfect trance inducing pentacle that would work for everyone. These were my thoughts immediately before shifting my gaze to the spirit of the river.
The first thing I asked after we greeted each other was a kind of rhetorical question, more an exclamation of surprise that the river didn't want to drown me. "Why would I?" replied the river, "I will keep on flowing whether you drown in me or not."
I felt relief and the next thing I asked was whether the river was a dragon. I asked this because I think of it poetically as alike unto a winding black serpentine dragon.
It laughed its response, "Some call me that, others call me a Kelpie."
"Don't Kelpies drown people?"
"Kelpies don't want to drown people. Kelpies want to reunite people with their emotions. Only when a person becomes detached and repulsed by their own emotions do they interpret the message of a Kelpie as an invitation to drown themselves, either through careless risk or deliberate suicide."
I choked a little at this because I remembered a time when looking into rivers had the effect of making me feel that they were inviting me to drown in them. Probably why I asked the question in the first place. I was also in an emotionally difficult place in those days.
"You don't want to drown yourself do you. You aren't out of touch with your emotions."
I realised this was true. I had indeed moved on, become emotionally stronger and gained new understanding of my emotions. Gained a better vocabulary to describe them and communicate them to others so it no longer felt like a side of myself I was alone with. I understood then why I felt like the river wanted to drown me when I was younger but not now.
I realised I had a close friend that has accepted my offer of magical help, who is currently going through an emotionally difficult time, and I asked the river if it could help them. It suggested that this friend visits a river themselves and sit by it, talk to it if they can.
Finally, as I looked back to my pentacle to end the ritual, I noticed that staring into the fast flowing waters for all this time had caused my vision to go wavy. I looked back to the river and complemented it on its ability to induce trance, better even than my pentacle.
"Yes, you don't need that here. Feel welcome to bring it, but don't feel you need it to talk to me."
I began this rite by raising work magic gnosis. I did this by vacuum cleaning the house after lighting the altar candles and performing the task as a meditation.
I then sat in meditation and focused my gaze upon the orange doll seated upon the pentacle. A friend of mine had requested magical aid from me concerning work and it was my intention to ask the orange doll for advice. I had given this friend some preliminary advice of my own, but I wondered if the orange doll would agree with me.
She didn't. Instead she offered only some cryptic advice that she said my friend would understand. I asked her if she could help magically with his problems. And she responded that she could if he followed her advice. I will relate that advice to my friend privately, not publishing it here.
I then thanked her for all the help she had given me with my own work situation over recent years. I asked if she had any advice for me regards WhIP. She told me that I should collate the material from this 'summoning storm' into a booklet, maybe adding some introduction and other information, and then perform similar operations for the cup, sword and wand. I should apparently publish a set of small booklets on these operations.
I asked her if this was the same project Kazeebo had mentioned I should do. She said not really. She reminded me that Kazeebo was a Play Magic doll, and the book she recommended I write would be a lot of fun. She then told me that what she was recommending instead was a series of books that would actually make WhIP financially successful.
I thanked her for this advice.
I had in the past given her the name 'Peeaye', a pun on PA or Personal Assistant. I asked her if she liked this name. She was kind of 'meh' about it. She didn't like the 'Personal Assistant' association. She suggested I call her 'Peeair' instead, which is pronounced exactly like the French name 'Pierre' apparently.
I should perhaps have expected Eris to show up strong on day 5 of this operation, although perhaps if I did she wouldn't have, just to keep me guessing. I didn't quite expect Glasgow council to decide to honour her by announcing they would 'sink' 5 tower blocks on the 23rd July however! Clearly Discordians have infiltrated the council there. Oh I know they SAY its for a sporting event, but they would say that wouldn't they?
And then, as I'm entering the forest car park, I notice the robin singing from a different place than usual, and it alerts me to the fact that there is a gate to someone's back garden right there in the car park! What is more, they have the number 23!
Before I got started a bird flew by that I think may have been a red kite. I couldn't quite tell because it was flying into the sun and all I could see was its silhouette. It wasn't behaving like a crow, the only other bird it might have been.
I had taken my camera with me as I had realised that I was sharing pictures of the indoor rituals but had none for the outdoor ones. So this time before I began I took a picture of the pentacle in the place I would use it, from the perspective of where I sit.
I began again with the technique of focusing my gaze upon the pentacle. As I did so I got a sense of it as a mandala, a symbol of order in the sea of dancing natural chaos about it.
As I tried to raise my awareness from the pentacle to one of the surrounding spirits, I initially failed to make contact. The ones that I remembered seeing towards the end of my last evocation here seemed missing, or in hiding. But when I looked up I again saw the antlered figure that last time I had thought of as Cernunnos.
I told him of my plan to help clear litter from the forest once I'd finished this magical operation, and he told me I should do so within the month. I told him I didn't want anything in return for my efforts and he told me that it would go some way towards earning their friendship.
I asked him if he was Cernunnos but he told me I could call him Angus.
"Angus Ogg?" I asked.
"Yes" he replied.
"I thought you would be taller..." I said, regretting it almost instantly.
"Fool! Do you think I am this sapling? No, I am not, you are merely seeing me through it."
I heard the strange grunting sound again, that had felt so threatening initially the first time. I looked around again and this time I saw some birds fluttering their wings at each other from within the branches of some fallen trees. It wasn't grunts at all but the fluttering of little birds wings!
"Yes", said Angus when I returned my gaze to him, "it is birds. Now you know. As you can hear they are all quite busy with their own lives right now. They don't feel threatened by your presence."
Some crows flew over, with some soft caws, and this seemed to me a signal to look to the underworld, my gaze returning to Persephone and the serpent Hades. It was Hades that spoke to me this time.
This time for my outdoor ritual I went no further than my own back garden. What spirits might I find there? As I began I noticed the beautiful song of a robin, a bird I have already noted I have come to associate as 'opener of the ways'. A good sign. 🙂
As always, after gazing at my pentacle until my vision seemed to dance, I looked up to see what I would find 'rising' out of the pentacle. This time the first spirit came not in the form of a pareidolia, but simply our rosemary plant talking as itself. It complained of me cutting branches from it. Next some hedges also complained about being pruned. The black-current bush, which we have never cut, seemed happy with me however.
I addressed the unhappy plants by asking if they would have preferred to grow in the wild were rabbits and deer could eat them unhindered. They agreed they would not prefer it at all. In the end they agreed I could cut from them and prune them so long as overall they could grow bigger. I agreed to this, even said I would like the hedge to grow taller so it can block out my view of an annoying garden light from a neighbour across the street.
With them satisfied my attention turned to the black-current bush, whose magnificent blossom I now realised was the source of the wonderful fragrance I detected in the night air. Suddenly these flowers made their presence known to me as Persephone, goddess of flowers and of the underworld. As they did so the robin stopped singing and flew over from wherever it had been perched to sit visibly on the plum tree. I wondered if it would sing for me there, but alas there came a challenging call from a blackbird and the robin beat a hasty retreat. The blackbird chased after it, flying so low it passed merely a meter in front of my face.
My attention returned to Persephone who introduced me to two more presences, these appearing as pareidolia in the branches of the plum and apple trees. One in the form of a serpent emerging from behind Persephone introduced itself as Hades. The other having the head of a giant hunting bird introduced itself as the Thunderbird.
My attention returned to Persephone, who was now ready to impart to me a message or request. Apparently we should put out some grave lanterns this coming Halloween, in the places in our garden where we buried the dead birds.
It is said that evocation of daemons can serve one or both of two purposes, enchantment and/or divination. It is said that an enchantment is basically when you want to influence the future whereas divination is when you want to predict it. In practise I find it slightly different. For me divination is simply a kind of enchantment where what you want is to obtain information. Communication with daemons tends to give information simply as a result of them talking to you and telling you things. Of course you can ask for information on specific subjects. You can also ask for them to do things for you. They might refuse, but I find if they are friendly they will mostly help. I never resort to old school techniques of binding them to my will as I can usually find a daemon willing to enter proper friendship.
Before today my evocations in this summoning storm have been for divination. Today is different. I had an enchantment I wished from the red doll. I made a sigil for it. I made this in the form of the 'Dragon Tree Rune', a bindrune created by Dragon Environmental Network back in 1990. I first came across it myself during the Talking Stick Magickal Conference of 1994. At this event I took part in a magickal charging of the same rune by directing energy at a large version of it (made of card if I remember correctly) was passed around from dancer to dancer.
This time however I constructed a composite sigil much like the one made for the KIA Egregore group sigil charging ritual. Only this time I was drawing it alone. The main aim of this sigil is for a rather specific cause, to bring to justice those responsible for poisoning red kites and buzzards in Scotland, in particular the 13 birds so poisoned in a 2 mile radius in Ross shire. As pointed out to me in the comments of my recent 'Thunderbirds and Red Kites' post by Janice Duke. More generally however the sigil also aims to bring an end to industry practises that threaten these birds, seals, and other wildlife. And if that isn't possible, to destroy such industries.
With this in mind, I began this evocation by raising martial energy. I began with what I could remember of the Tai Chi fan form. Then putting the fan aside I performed martial moves for several minutes, combining Tai Chi with Tae Kwon Do.
When done, I sat down in meditation before the altar, as always starting with an address of the pentacle. This time I really felt the presence of the doll even whilst I was addressing the pentacle, but she waited patiently for her turn. I sensed she was already aware of what I wanted.
"You know why I summoned you." I asked.
"To charge this sigil behind me." she replied.
"You accept there will be a risk involved?"
"Yes, I accept that."
"Very well, I shall charge the sigil for you."
"Is that all?"
"That is all I want, but I am willing to listen if you have anything to say."
She then gave me some advice which I will not share publicly, concerning my strengths and weaknesses in magical defence.
"You also need more allies. I can't help you get them, for that you need to ask the Green Doll, but I can advise that you need them." she concluded.
"Okay thanks, I will." I told her.
I bowed to her, but she chided me for not keeping eye contact, which reminded me of my old Tae Kwon Do master.
This time I decided to try out a different part of the forest for my outdoor evocation. There is a place set back from the main path where some curiously round large rocks poke out gingerly from the surround shrubs. I decided to sit on the rock with the pentacle on a slightly lower part of it before me.
Initially I realised I wasn't sure what I intended to evoke. I wasn't sure whether to go for the spirit of the forest itself this time, or whether since this was a new spot maybe I should get to know the place spirit first. As I was deciding a wedge of about 30 to 40 geese flew over.
I opted for the place. I used the same technique as yesterday, staring at the pentacle until the surroundings start to dance, and then looking for pariedolia. This time I was rewarded after a few seconds with the spotting of a shy green troll hiding behind some saplings. It was like a shy child because it was looking at me with one eye poking out from around the corner and just half its mouth visible.
It threatened to eat me, but of course I didn't believe it. This was the game of a troll child. I challenged it to come out and eat me then, but it fell silent. It started telling me I should be buried in these woods, but I told it that it was unlikely that would be allowed. My ashes maybe. It wanted my ashes so I started bargaining with it.
However, suddenly this troll was replaced with another one that spoke in a chiding voice, to the both of us, saying how they don't want my ashes. This troll was more confident and adult in behaviour and had a grandmotherly voice. At first it appeared grumpy, but I think that is because it was chiding us for bargaining over my ashes.
I asked her what I could do for her and she told me I should remove litter from the forest. I asked what I would receive in return and she chided me again for 'always thinking about trade.'
This set me off thinking in my head for a bit, I'm not sure how long, but when I realised I had drifted I refocused on the troll and apologised "I do this all the time to people too" I reassured her. "You should work on that" she told me. I promised I would.
She indicated it was time I look for another spirit to talk to, and as I was looking two wood pigeons flew over and landed in some nearby trees. Soon after I noticed a strange little plant that resembled a small bird with a large beak. I greeted it.
"Feed me" it said in fast trill voice. I promised to.
After noticing how tired I was after yesterdays evening evocation, I decided to try a different time of day for this one and performed the evocation during my lunch break.
Working from home makes this a possibility.
The conversation began with a communication that this doll is not happy without a name. It doesn't want to be called 'Yellow Doll'. It wants a proper name like Kazeebo has.
The doll then gave me advice on which glamours I should develop. It used my own Five point scale to advance on the 'Emperor' image it told me to develop after the Glamour Discovery Rite. Apparently now I should develop a suitable 'Level 2' image and also a 'Level 3' image.
The level 2 lends itself to something Priestly, so my initial thoughts in that direct suggest something Discordian, the only religion I've been vaguely involved in lately, with perhaps one exception.
Level 3 suggests business in some way. I guess I am trying to launch the 'WhIP (When Illuminated Press)' publishers. Maybe it suggests I need to develop my image as a publisher and also perhaps improve the image of WhIP itself.
I guess I'm not ready for level 4 and 5 glamours as I didn't receive anything for them yet. Its possible that each needs to build on a good foundation...
My Yellow Doll is the last one I made (with the exception of the Octarine Doll). Technically I haven't actually finished his sigils, but he looks pretty good so far, and I've already begun working with him in ritual evocations, so I thought I'd share him here now. I will post an update with a more complete picture once he is more complete.
Last night I performed the second evocation of the day, that of my Purple Doll.
I began with an automatic drawing to get into the creative flow. This was unspectacular in and of itself, mostly squiggles and spirals. It was quite late and I suspected I was already feeling slightly drained from all the evocations I had already done. Not a good sign since this was still only day two. It did however also include the figure of a man, naked apart from a blazer jacket and a hat. He had a rather large erect cock, pointy troll like ears and was smoking from a large 'Sherlock Holmes' style pipe.
This was followed by a communication with the doll, sitting in meditation. A large part of this communication was kind of personal and relates to my sex life, so I won't be sharing it here in public, but suffice to say the advice seemed sensible and I plan to try following it.
There was a small bit concerning artistic creativity. The advice was that I should do more collaborations with other creators...
Today's first evocation took place in the same spot in the woods where I first started the summoning storm, the toad pond. We called it a toad pond because we noticed a large cluster of what might be frog or toad spawn floating in the leaves near the middle of it.
As I entered the forest a robin sang in a tree by the gate. In my connection to the the birds I have come to feel the robin as 'opener of the ways' so this seemed appropriate. As I walked into the woods I found my slow walk shifting my consciousness. It was like the opening and banishing rituals performed at the start and close of ceremonial rituals, only instead of going around in circles, it lead a winding serpentine path.
Summoning the spirit of a place should prove one of the easiest forms of evocation, since you don't need to summon it from anywhere. Its presence can easily seen with eye. You need only summon your own attention to it.
None the less, I placed my pentacle on the tree stump and began my evocation by focusing on the pentacle again. I doubt I was visible from the main footpath, but I found myself imagining what I would say if some passer by should intrude upon the space and ask what I was doing. This lead to me thinking of the pentacle as 'not an idol' and me asking the passer-by 'do I look like I would worship a piece of wood with paint?' I managed to get out of this by thinking how the pentacle was so much more than its material constituents.
I began to think that on the one hand it represents so many metaphysical concepts,whilst on the other it is just a piece of wood with decorative paint. In this it bridges the worlds and acts as a portal or gate between them, through which contact with daemons can occur.
At this point I was in a kind of trance appreciating the beauty of the place and how slightly surreal my pentacle looked in this setting. A part of me longed for a camera to take a picture. The other was glad to be free from such a distraction. As my trance intensified I found the focus of my vision shifting and the scene I watched began to dance in ebbs and flows.
It danced for what seemed like a couple more minutes before I came to the realisation that it was probably time to raise the spirit. As I imagined the spirit rising up out of the pentacle my eyes moved up in this direction, looking for a spirit to appear. A part of me expected a kind of pariedolia in the natural scenery. At first this prove elusive, where those feet? If so are those arms? Breats? Is that a woman? But no. Then suddenly I realised the form wasn't humanoid but animal. But it wasn't a deer. I thought maybe a frog, but then suddenly it hit me, I was looking at a giant cricket!
At first its message was hostile. I heard an angry grunting sound behind me and imagined an angry stag wanting to get to the toad pond for a drink. I imagined it aggressively butting me out of the way. The message seemed clear, I was an intruder here. I nearly decided to up and leave.
Then I thought of the old deamonologists cry "Not in that form!" Realising this as an instruction to change my own focus, I shifted my consciousness to a second pariedolia. This time one that resembled a skinny little man with the head of a stag and a cock the size of his arm. A sort of cross between Cernunnos and Priapus.
"What about you?" I asked, "Do you agree with the grasshopper?"
Again I heard the angry grunting sound behind me but this time I turned around to see what was up. Nothing. I could see nowhere behind me that a deer could be hiding. The main hiding place would have placed the deer on the main footpath, where at this time of day many dog walkers strolled.
I turned back to the little horned one. I received his message, "Our fears evaporate when we turn to face them."
I then became aware of some force of nature reclaiming my pentacle. The price of working with a wooden pentacle outdoors in woodland is that eventually the woodland will reclaim the wood from which it is made. I accepted this price on the condition that nature empowers the magic of the pentacle in the mean time. Anyway, the thought of wanting the pentacle to remain pristine in some museum long after I had died seemed somewhat perverse.
On accepting this price a third pariedolia showed itself to me. This time a serpent emerging from the ground and carrying a woman. Hades and Persephone I realised...
The second evocation of Day 1, performed last night, was of my blue doll, Kazeebo. I placed her upon the pentacle, and sat in meditation in order to contact her. I should have realised however that a full on evocation of Kazeebo is never that easy and she remained unresponsive, giving me vague instructions to 'get more toys' which I initially understood as her being bored with her bondage teddy.
Finally though I got her meaning and realised that to communicate with her properly I needed to play with some toys, not sit in boring and serious meditation!
Rather than get the toys I usually reserved for Kazeebo rituals, this time I grabbed the collection of mine and Lolita's plush toys from the sofa and began playing with them!
Once I got in the proper spirit of this Kazeebo finally imparted her advice to me:
Apparently I should write a magical training manual, in Discordian style, with easy to read text, a fun and playful attitude, and lots of silly pictures. One that would have appealed to my young self just at the time I was getting into magic. I'll give that some thought...
The first of the dolls that I made was the blue magic doll. I named her Kazeebo. I named some of the other dolls, but only this name stuck. I'm not sure the other dolls liked their names. I may have to rename them at some point. Her ritual is published in Kaos Hieroglyphica in the 'blue magic' section. It involves playing with toys and singing her rhyme:
'Sing a song of pleasure,
A blue doll full o' treasure,
We all have fun!'
The first time I performed her ritual in a large group, at an IOT national meeting, during the part of the ritual where we were all playing with toys, some of the magicians involved began dressing up Kazeebo and pierced her with play earings and and a belly button peircing. Somehow I got so possessed by the spirit of a child that I became incredibly possessive and angry about this, and before I realised the absurdity of this I had torn some of them out! As what I was doing dawned on me I burst out laughing at recognition of my folly, but also slightly marvelling at the depth of my childhood possession, that it could override my normal adult behaviours and thinking to such an extent. In the IOT laughing is banishing, and this served to set everyone off laughing. Luckily it was actually the end of the rite.
Later this year I intend to embark on a commitment to a serious magical working lasting several months, with a commitment to daily rituals and other practises. To help get myself in shape (mentally) I thought it might be a good idea to do something like a 'chaos monasticism', as described by Pete Carroll in 'Liber Kaos'. I remembered doing a 15 day monasticism in the latter part of the twentieth century.
Then I remembered that he also added similar exercises to these for the other elemental weapons in his book 'PsyberMagick'. I decided to re-read these for inspiration as I have been working strongly on my pentacle.
My planned operation is similar to, and inspired by, the 'Chaos CyberZoo' as described by Carroll. However there are some differences, so I will describe the operation I am currently undertaking so those interested can compare. I have decided to call my own version a 'summoning storm'.
To begin the operation I took the pentacle outside to a local powerspot and performed an evocation of the 'spirit of the pentacle' for guidance. I received some communication on how it would like to be painted on its inverse side. The paint on the main side has gone through several iterations, whilst the inverse side remains unpainted wood. I also received a communication on how it would like to be marked to commemorate the operation. As the spot I chose was next to a small frog or toad pond, I blessed the pentacle with its water.
For an undefined number of days I will:
* Carry my pentacle with me when ever I leave home
* Perform at least one evocation per day (I plan to do at least one out of doors, plus at least one indoors each day), using the pentacle in an appropriate way.
* Whilst at home, the pentacle will be placed on a specially prepared altar when not in use.
* Whilst outside, the pentacle will be placed inside a special bag of its own when not in use.
To conclude the operation I will take the pentacle back to the same spot I began, and perform a final evocation of its spirit. Thus will conclude the summoning storm.
I also plan to post regular updates on this site of my progress. I'm aiming for 11 days. This is day 1.